Goodbye to my book
It’s with a heavy heart that I decided to stop selling my book, The $10,000 Dream Wedding.
Unfortunately, it’s not helping my reputation with fellow wedding professionals. Helping brides like you save money…especially when we’re in the midst of a recession…just doesn’t sit well with desperate, money-starved wedding vendors.
Who would have guessed?
I’ve had some threats to drive me out of the business…people calling me a traitor…saying I’ve turned against the wedding industry.
Yeah, it pretty much sucked. I tried to ignore it, but I can’t allow my business to suffer.
I still want to help my brides. That isn’t changing. And I still want to hear your savings story!
But the book is no longer available for sale.
The good news…
I’m keeping this blog alive, though I won’t be posting as often, so that you can continue to use it as a reference. Also, the wedding budget planning, timeline, checklist and wedding questions to ask will still be available for anyone who has bought the book.
My deepest thanks to everyone who has supported me and my book. And especially to those brides who reached out to encourage me and express their sorrow that The $10,000 Dream Wedding is going away.
You guys are the best!
Happy planning,
Stephanie
July 14, 2009 No Comments
Don’t Get Taken! Wedding Photographer Contract Scams
Question from a real bride:
“Hey Stephanie,
I have already booked my venue—–$1500 for a very nice–not tacky hall for both the ceremony and reception ballroom!!!!! WOOT!!! I cannot believe the savings! Yay!
But, I am about to book a photographer of whom has a contract that is not very specific on the timing. It is lacking a section that says what time she is to arrive to take pictures. My question is…..should I write something in and tell her? Am I allowed to write in things? Also, I don’t have a finalized photo shot list yet. Should I write in “photographer agrees to abide by photo shot list given”? Even that is not in the contract already.
Let me say this, I LOVE my photographer. She is as sweet as sugar, professional, and does great work, and she also negotiated with me, or rather let me name the price. But, I need to make sure that the contract is protecting me too. Frankly, I do trust her, but I KNOW no matter who the person is, I need to NOT trust them, hehe.
How do I get the contract to my liking without sounding too flaky. I don’t want her to think I’M trying to scam her.
Thanks!
Melissa”
My answer:
Dear Sweet Melissa,
Do you think of yourself as a “good girl?” You’re an absolutely sweetheart, so concerned about your wedding photographer thinking you’re trying to scam her.
You’re going to scam her? By protecting yourself?
“Good Girls” get taken advantage of by unscrupulous wedding vendors. “Good Girls” end up paying 2-3 times more than they have to for their weddings.
Quit being a Good Girl!
Hey, I used to be a good girl, too. Then I wised up and realized that if I don’t protect my ass, nobody was gonna do it for me.
Your contract should include any and all specifics for your wedding…including date, times of coverage, location, who will be shooting, any “Must Take Photos,” the price for the exact services you’re booking, terms of cancellation and payment, etc.
You can write a clause into your contract, but it won’t be valid unless it’s initialed by both of you. I suggest asking your photographer to revise it with the clauses you request.
I’m sure she is an honest, trustworthy professional. But don’t sign the contract until its revised to your liking.
If it makes you feel better, blame it on yourself. Tell her, “I’m such a worrier than I’ll make myself miserable if I don’t take care of every detail. It’ll be huge weight off my shoulders if you could make these changes for me.”
A true professional WILL NOT take it personally. Her contract was written to protect her…not you. Don’t sign the contract until it specifically promises exactly what you are paying for.
With everything in writing there won’t be any misunderstanding. Plus, you’re protected if anything does go wrong.
Did you read my recent blog posts on vendor disputes and contracts? A recent bride of mine just had a situation where her photographer didn’t take her Must Take Photos and delivered a horrible DVD…and she doesn’t have any legal recourse because it wasn’t in the contract. It’s worth a read.
Hmm…looks like I’m going to have to put out that special report on How NOT To Get Screwed By Wedding Vendors soon…
Good luck with everything and keep saving!
Stephanie
April 11, 2009 No Comments
Watch Out For This Wedding Dress Rip Off…Literally
Been shopping for your wedding dress yet?
Finding “the” dress is one of the most exciting things about getting married. It’s also ripe for the RIP OFF. Literally.
The biggest rip off…
Most bridal shops remove the labels from designers wedding gowns. This is illegal, by the way…a label is required by law to designate the designer, manufacturer or distributor according to the Federal Trade Commission. Check out their article, “Unveiling the Truth About Wedding Dresses.”
If the label’s missing when you try on a dress..the bridal shop is breaking the law.
Bridal shops started pulling this literal “rip off” to keep you from finding a dress you love in their shop and buying it cheaper from a discount store online. Instead of figuring out how to compete with the discount outlets, they rip off the evidence. Many bridal boutiques also forbid the use of cameras so you can’t identify it on your own later.
Anything to keep you enslaved to paying higher prices.
Unfortunately, without labels it’s impossible to know for sure if the designer dress you’ve chosen was truly made by that designer. Some shops even trick brides by selling them sample or used dresses when they paid full retail price for a brand new one.
So what can you do?
I reveal all the details about the wedding dress scams to avoid and how to find your designer dress at up to 92% off in my book. But here are some ways to fight back…
- Don’t buy from the bridal shop. You can almost always find a better deal on the exact same dress somewhere else. Try ‘em on, learn what you love…and leave ‘em high and dry.
- Check the ID number. Shops are permitted to remove the original label and replace it with a store label that identifies the designer, manufacturer or distributor by ID number. Copy down the ID number on the tag (if there is one) and make sure the designer is who they claim on the FTC’s website in the RN Lookup Database.
- If they won’t tell you the designer…don’t buy from them. Take detailed notes on the design of a dress you like, including the silhouette, neckline, length, etc. and locate it online.
- Never pay cash and always get a receipt. Read your contract carefully and make sure it has all the specifics written in clearly.
Don’t get ripped off! It’s up to you to protect yourself and make the most of your money so you can plan the wedding of your dreams.
If brides band together and so NO to wedding rip offs maybe those bridal shops will finally wise up and start giving brides the service they deserve.
Got a wedding dress story, good or bad? Leave me a comment.
April 10, 2009 2 Comments
Spring 2009 Wedding Trends Vivid and Bold
The trends for 2009 weddings this spring are all about vibrant color: lemon yellow, fuscia red, vivid green, palace blue.
It’s about time winter got a swift kick in the behind!
The designers report their favorite colors in this report from Pantone. Borrow these as inspiration for your spring wedding.
Flirty lemon yellow bridesmaids’ dresses…
Or a full length formal…
Fuschia popping out of the flowers…

This green is so fresh, so SPRING…
The blue bridal party…
Electric blue irises…
Forget about pastels. Eye-catching, bold as brass, full-on assault COLOR is in!
April 8, 2009 No Comments
2009 Average Wedding Cost Drops Another 12%; Prices Dropping Like Flies
Are you in a state of shock and panic over wedding prices?
I’ve got good news for you…
Brides are spending LESS.
Um, right. And how exactly is this good news?
Well, brides spending less means wedding vendors are making less money. Which makes them start to PANIC…maybe as much as you did at first when you found out how darn expensive weddings can be.
(It’s about time they got a taste of their own medicine, right?)
When most wedding professionals get panicked…the first thing they do is drop their price. You better believe you can get top quality wedding services at bargain prices that haven’t been seen since the ’80’s. Not only are vendors dropping their prices, they’re throwing in extras and offering wedding discount coupons out of desperation to get your business.
How do you know?
Good on you for asking, you smart, sassy bride.
The average wedding cost dropped another 12% in the first quarter of 2009 based on 780 surveys of brides and wedding vendors conducted by The Wedding Report. This is attributed mainly to:
- A decreased overall demand for products and services.
- More couples marrying by a justice of the peace or other non-traditional means.
- Couples holding the ceremony and reception at the same location to cut costs.
Add this to the other tools and tricks to slash your wedding expenses in half that you’ll learn in my book, The $10,000 Dream Wedding…and the wedding discounts and deals available right now are unbelievable.
This survey suggests that brides are spending less to cut costs and they are…but I also see brides spending less because wedding vendors are slashing their prices. These businesses are SCARED.
Have you taken a glance at the housing market lately? Housing prices have tanked. You can buy a house at half or even a third what it was worth two years ago. Houses in Detroit are selling for under $7,500!
The same thing is happening in the wedding industry.
If ever there was a time to step up and seize your wedding discounts…it’s NOW.
April 6, 2009 No Comments
Deadly Wedding Dates To Avoid
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Set the wrong date and your dream wedding is TOAST.
I reveal the best Price Slashing Wedding Dates that can save you up to 65% in my book, but make sure you avoid these babies below at all costs.
If you pick a bad date your guests might not come (or your family could throw a fit!) you might pay higher prices, or you may not be able to book the vendors and services you really want.
Time for a real life example to show just how deadly picking the wrong date can be.
Jessica’s fiancé was Jewish. Unknowingly, Jessica set her wedding date smack dab in the middle of Yom Kippur.
Half of her fiance’s family couldn’t come and they were all very offended. On top of that, Jessica’s Maid of Honor got married the week before. Choosing a bad date caused stress, anxiety and nightmares that could have easily been avoided.
Check this list of 2009 and 2010 Wedding Dates To Avoid before you set the date.
Some less obvious deadly dates to consider:
- Any dates near other weddings in your family…unless you really want to share.
- College graduations, festivals, parades and other big events on your wedding weekend. Prices are higher and hotels are booked way in advance.
- Any “unhappy” dates for your family: anniversaries of deaths, divorces, etc.
Your wedding date is a powerful weapon of savings…or an ax that can kill your party DEAD. Take your time selecting the date that’s right for you.
How did you pick your date? Leave me a comment.
April 4, 2009 No Comments
Wedding Gown Inspiration Stolen From Taylor Swift
Taylor Swift’s dress in her “Love Story” video is to die for. A touch of Renaissance mystique and a corseted waist that shows off her itty bitty figure. Bitch.
Of course, her dress was custom made. But that doesn’t mean you can’t steal the idea for your wedding.
Dress Like Taylor (yes, a whole website dedicated to imitating Ms. Swift’s fashion persona) suggests two dresses similar to the one she wears in the “Love Story” video.
How about this corseted medieval wedding dress from Medieval Bridal Fashions?
Or this corset wedding dress fashioned after the Maggie Sottero design?
I love the corseted waists! If you can handle not breathing all night, the look is stunning. I’m far too practical to ever pull that off, but I can dream…
What’s your wedding inspiration? Leave a comment.

April 3, 2009 No Comments
Chatty Bride? 5 Ways To Talk Your Way Into A Deal.
If you’re a chatty girl…aka “Big Mouth”…you may have an advantage as a bride when it comes to getting a wedding discount.
Then again, ANY bride can do this. You’ve just gotta be talking about the right stuff. Make sure you download my free report to learn how to use the Bride’s Secret Weapon that will literally compel wedding vendors to offer you a wedding discount.
Here are a few pointers I adopted from this Lifehacker post Top 10 Tips For Talking Your Way Into A Better Deal.
1) Use the 15-20% Rule. If you’re a newbie when it comes to doing the deal and you don’t know where to start, ask for 15-20% less than your absolute highest price. (Of course, I know you can do MUCH better than that with a little Diva Dealing training.)
2) Just ASK. Simply asking for a deal will get you a discount in 3 out of 4 cases. Really!
3) Learn To Use the Power of Silence. Know those uncomfortable silences? Use them to your advantage in negotiations. Make an offer and then SHUT UP. Use the pressure of the uncomfortable silence to urge them into a deal. Remember: he who speaks first loses.
4) Buy At the Right Time. This is CRITICAL. Buy your wedding dress in April-May or Nov-Dec for the best deals. If you’re dealing with a salesperson who has a quote, buy at the end of the month because they’ll offer you discounts to make their monthly numbers.
5) Commit To Your Maximum Price and WALK AWAY If You Don’t Get It. That puts you in control.
Got a bridal bargaining story to share? Leave a comment.
April 1, 2009 No Comments
Designer Dress Bargains For Budget Brides
Every time I pick up the newspaper RECESSION is blasted across the headlines. And weddings…traditionally viewed as lavish, extravagant affairs…are getting a recession make-over. Check out this New York Times article, “A Sale To Benefit Charity and Thrifty Brides-To-Be.” You’ve gotta love the photo of the bride to be in the red and white beanie with blue horns and stars adjusting her “girls” as she tries on a dress.
Downsize. Cutting back. Budget. Trim.
No matter what you call it, brides are doing it. The deals to be had right now are phenomenal. You can learn how to take full advantage of these recession deals on wedding gowns in my book. But for now, take some pointers from these thrifty brides.
One bride snagged an Emerald wedding gown that originally sold for over $1,000 for only $250. Another bought her dress for only $80.
How do you pull it off?
1) Know what you want first. Surf photo galleries of wedding gowns on the internet, clip pictures from magazines. Visit a few stores to try on dresses…shopping for options and not to buy…until you have an idea of the style you like.
2) Shop the sample and bargain basement sales. Filene’s Basement started the original “Running of the Brides” blowout bridal sale in 1947 and bridal boutiques have been copying them ever since. Designer dresses typically start at $250 at these marathon events.
Take a cue from thrifty brides and bring a posse with you if you attempt a sample sale. One person to hold the dresses, one to find the right size, and one to run interference.
Sign up for a free account at Top Button to locate the sample sales near you or try these other sites to locate sample sales.
3) Visit a consignment shop in an upscale neighborhood. Consignment shops only accept perfect or near perfect items and you can locate one in your area at this link.
4) Browse the selection at local thrift shops, the Salvation Army and Goodwill. Beware of damaged dresses, as thrift shop quality typically isn’t quite as high. Contact them to find out if they’re planning to hold their own bridal event.
5) EBAY! If you know what you want you can find it at deep discounts here.
6) Buy used dresses online from Preowned Wedding Dresses or BridePower.
Whatever you do, know that you DON’T have to pay $2,000+ for the wedding gown of your dreams. Find the option that works for you and work it girl!
How did you snag your designer dress at a discount? Leave me a comment and share the knowledge.
March 30, 2009 No Comments
How NOT To Get Screwed By Wedding Vendors
In my last blog post, I talked about what to do if you get screwed by a wedding vendor. But how can you avoid getting screwed in the first place?
QUICK NOTE: My book, The $10,000 Dream Wedding, reveals the essentials you need to know, the scams to look out for, and the common mistakes to avoid. But here are some simple steps you can take to avoid getting screwed…
If you take the time to do your research beforehand, you’ll be able to avoid the courts later on. You won’t have to worry about getting ripped off.
On the other hand, if you don’t do your homework before hiring you can get taken advantage of and then not have a leg to stand on in court.
Two Ways To Avoid Getting Screwed
1) Hire Reliable Wedding Professionals With An Impeccable Reputation
- Ask for recommendations of family and friends who actually used their services personally. Word of mouth recommendations are great…but only from people who actually hired the vendor. “Friend of a friend” referrals are not nearly as reliable.
- Check the Better Business Bureau for complaints against the vendor. Make sure your potential vendor has no complaints against them.
- Ask your local Chamber of Commerce for referrals.
- Ask potential wedding professionals for references and then CHECK THEM. Keep in mind that they are only likely to refer positive references. However, if you ask good questions you can often “read between the lines” and find out what they were like to deal with.
2) Put Everything In Your Contract.
- Get everything in writing. Spell out IN DETAIL the products and services you want. If you want the DJ to play specific songs, list them in the contract or in an addendum. If you want the photographer to take certain specific photos, write them in.
- Make sure your contract includes a “penalty” if the vendor violates the terms of your agreement. For instance, you should get a 100% refund, including your deposit, if they cancel. If a DJ doesn’t play every “Must Play” song or a photographer doesn’t take every “Must Take” photo, you should get at least a partial refund. This provides a financial incentive for them to keep their word.
- Some vendors will resist this. After all, they’ve written the contract to protect themselves…not you. Simply tell them, “I’m very detail oriented. I’d like to trust your word, but I feel much more comfortable getting everything in writing so that there is no misunderstanding.”
- If a vendor refuses to make the additions to the contract that you request…DON’T HIRE THEM. You’re only asking that they provide a written guarantee of their verbal promise. If they plan on fulfilling their agreement, why should they have a problem with making it official?
Money Back Guarantees
Some wedding vendors offer a Money Back Guarantee. This is a smart way to reduce your risk. The terms may refund all or part of the fee if they don’t fulfill their agreement.
You might also ask a potential wedding vendor if she would be willing to offer such a guarantee. This way if the vendor doesn’t keep her part of the agreement, you’re protected.
You’re paying a lot of money for your wedding. It’s up to YOU to protect yourself and make the most of every penny you’ve got. Follow these guidelines and check out my book for more details.
Got a question about protecting yourself when hiring wedding vendors? Leave me a comment.
March 28, 2009 1 Comment
















