Category — Engagement

Over 200,000 couples get engaged on Valentine’s Day every year. This figure comes from the diamond industry, so take that with a grain of salt.

But this video demonstrates what happens when you dare make a proposal on Friday the 13th, the day before Valentine’s Day. The poor idiot pops the question in the middle of a “romantic” basketball game…and guess what happens? Good thing that giant stuffed mouse was there to console him.

There are many proposal stories documented on the internet. It’s one of my favorite questions to ask couples because of what it reveals about them…especially the groom.

Here are 5 proposals styles I run into:

The Family Proposal - He waits until you are at a family gathering, usually around the holidays or on a family vacation, and pops the question. Sometimes public, other times private, the guy who proposes this way is extremely connected and dedicated to his family. The upside: he’ll make a good dad. The downside: you’re going to be really close with your mother-in-law.

The Romantic Proposal - He goes for romance and sentiment in the proposal…usually the place you met, the site of your new home, the location of your first date, the beach at sunset. This guy is sensitive and caring when it counts. The upside: he’ll never forget to bring you flowers on Valentine’s Day. The downside: he’ll likely try for romance at the wrong time or place.

The Public Proposal - He picks a very public, very visible way to propose; the question is on a billboard…the radio…on television. This guy is all about making a statement. When he’s committed, he wants to share it with the world. The upside: he’ll stand up for you and your relationship. The downside: um, you might not want to share your private moments with an audience.

The Elaborate Proposal - He creates an elaborate scenario to make his proposal: a scavenger hunt leading you across town, a plot involving the help of numerous friends or a complicated series of events. This guy is creative, fun, and innovative. (That’s not what I’m talking about! Get your mind out of the gutter.) The upside: he’ll surprise you and keep you entertained. The downside: it can be exhausting.

The Everyday Proposal - He pops the question while you’re at home watching TV or taking the dogs for a walk. He may or may not have a ring. This guy is spontaneous and lives in the moment. I admit: I’ve got LOTS of personal experience with this one. The upside: he’s sincere and down to earth; what you see is what you get. The downside: you’re not likely to get romantic gifts or flowers out of the blue.

What’s your proposal story?

Photo by Jennifer Dickert

While only 7% of couples get married in December…19% get engaged over the holidays.

Why?  According to this New York Times article on The Rules of Engagement…

“Christmas is by far the No. 1 day for engagements,” Mr. Vadon (CEO of BlueNile.com online jeweler) said. “It is a season when you’re thinking about other people who are meaningful in your life. People are emotional. And an engagement is an important event you want to share with others, especially your family.

“Think about it. You’re about to spend the holidays with your in-laws. There’s a little pressure there to step up and propose.”

If you just got engaged…what’s the FIRST thing you should do?

Don’t tell anyone.

I know that’s a pretty tall order as you’re just bursting to tell everyone you meet, but let me explain…

As soon as you announce your engagement, everyone starts telling you EXACTLY what you need to do, and where, and how…

Before you know it, your wedding is totally derailed and you’ve got your mother, future mother-in-law, aunts, sisters and girlfriends planning it for you.  They mean well.  They’re excited for you.  But you need some time and space to figure out what’s right for YOUR big day.

One of my brides shared her experience.  Megan’s fiance proposed just before they were about to spend a long camping weekend together.  Before they broke the news, they spent a few days enjoying their secret.  Around the campfire, they talked about their dreams for the wedding they wanted to have.

“Even though our wedding plans changed a lot before the actual wedding day,” Megan said, “it was the perfect way to get engaged.  No one was around to influence us and tell us what to do.  We just talked about our wedding dreams.  It was wonderful.”

Try to have a long, heart-felt chat with your fiance about what you want your wedding to be like…before you scream it from the rafters.

Oh, and congratulations on your engagement!